Day Dreaming...

July has been a thinking month. More often then not, I care to voice my opinions. My friends know that I'm not really opposed to giving my opinion on the latest issues in the political sphere (cough....debt crisis. end cough.), what color eye make-up that they should use, etc. Maybe all of my thinking and this whole getting-used-to-the-new-job-thing (too many nights that I've stayed past my 5pm official end time) has taken up a lot of my blogging time, but I can attribute this to all of my thinking time too.

Have you ever just had a particular time in time your life you find your head more in the clouds than back in reality where it belongs? I think that process started for me in June and has continued through July. Our generation is in such a unique position if you sit and think about it. We've had enormous changes in our technology and communication, changes in Mother Nature extremes (can we say Snowpocalypse 2011, extreme bouts of heat in the Midwest, the rainiest July in Chicago since the 1800's??). Those are just a few. I really started thinking and comparing my current state of life to where many of my peers are in their various stage's of life, not in a bad way, more of like a scientist observing and conducting an experiment. For part of my job, I verify client's employment and also check their tax returns. Oh the things you learn.... For example, a fully legal and licensed New York City taxi driver made about $85,000 on his own between his salary and tips in 2010. Needless to say, definitely not making anywhere near that.

I most definitely do not believe that money is the end all be all in the grand scheme of life, cause it is not. It's interesting to views my peer's careers and what brings them joy. I really believe my path and career in life is always going to be evolving (thanks Gemini). I feel like I'm going to have to travel a ways down life's path to find my true passion.

In addition to career paths and different walks of life,  I've had some deeper thoughts. I've thought of my grandfather who's been gone for over 6 months now. His life and passing has brought up many other parts of my psyche I hadn't explored as well. I think I've really tried to make an effort to not take my family for granted as much since, at least I hope. Although I am a typical middle child, and I like to surround myself with many friends too. Enough talking and blabbering on me, the world has so many more issues and experiences out there and I need to wake up out of my day dream and get my feet wet.

A good place to start was with the over $80 I spent at the Borders-Going-Out-Of-Business sale last weekend. Amongst the books and cards that i purchased, at least 3 from the self-help section. I'm shameless. Oh well, I've always loved reading....onwards :)

Onward

So I may have missed a month, sorry! The title of this post is in honor of the book that I started reading last night and am having a hard time putting down. Onward: How Starbucks Fought for Its Life without Losing Its Soul. I think this work has fallen into my hands at a particularly interesting turn in my life. The book describes how Howard Schultz started Starbucks, which happens to be one of my favorite places in the word and yes, I do have a Starbucks gold card thank you very much! The book also covers how Schultz was able to move Starbucks forward through a faltering brand and profit margins, in addition to a terrible recession and yet, just how Starbucks was able to stay true to the core values of what Starbucks entails. The culmination of Schultz's ideas and strategy is simply that: onwards. Onwards to the next great idea, but yet still honoring what it took for you to get to that point.

So where's my point? Ha. Well, I'm officially 23 years old now, fully employed with a new company and content at this juncture in life. While other people in my life are speeding away towards new jobs, new families of their own, new life struggles, I am staying and observing for now. I think observing is the best way to put it. Take that for what you like, cause it is neither good now bad, just the truth. I've also taken to reading some more modern books on Buddhism again. I think that Buddhism has had a very calming and centering effect on me. Maybe in another blog I'll go into more detail. But for now, at this point on my map, all I know for certain is that the only constant in life is change, so true Buddha, so true.

Squeaky Clean

So you may have noticed the new, simpler background. I am legit up for some good spring cleaning this week! Started with cleaning up the blog and moved onto my room today. In true Polish form, I dusted, Windexed (if that's a word?), took everything out of the closet, switched all my winter clothes out and replaced them with the spring/summer clothes and then lugged all of the winter clothes back down in the basement for storage. I also cleared all of the shiz off my desk and cleaned the pretty MacBook (I need a good cover for it so it stays pretty - this weeks mission is to find one)! Therefore, I felt the need to share with everyone and wonder out loud some more in true Kaitlin form.

Spring is on its way, finally. Love is in the air my friends; engagements and weddings galore! I've been lighthearted and happy for all involved. I still have a nagging feeling in my stomach that I missed the boat on something when it came to dating. (Author's Note: Please see I'm from the Island of Misfit Toys... and you? for further insight). I can honestly say that right now out of my broad group of friends: grade school, high school, MSU, sorority, work, I know literally only 3 people who aren't at least "seeing" someone. This would normally send me into a tailspin of emotions. Yet, I've managed to surprise myself this time around.

I think that the self-help books combined with some more spiritual insight in my life lately has brought a weird sense of peace to my mind. Interestingly enough, this is a first for me. I am not mentally freaking out over all of this. Sure, I feel kinda left out of the party. But I just know this time around, I'm not going to be the last guest waiting there for my entire life.  It's just not right for me now. Okay, enough blah blah blah on my life. Time for kudos. I'm sending out some positive gratitude for the following: an upcoming nuptial to take place in Texas in a month and all of the people I haven't seen in forever that I get to spend an entire weekend with, flowers finally blooming, people that share similar life views with me (even if she is an older celebrity), getting to watch my favorite movie Beauty & The Beast while baby-sitting, and always and forever books. Also, gratitude for spring cleaning. Out with the negative energy that I've had in 2011, in with the new and positive. Wishing everyone some time for some spiritual and physical cleansing :)

Spring time in East Lansing, Michigan. Circa 2010

Bruises

I've found that I am reading. Like a lot a lot lately. I don't think I've read this much since I was in high school and I could find time in the summers between basketball camps and babysitting. I feel like I could never have enough good book recommendations.

And on Tuesday, I stumbled upon a book entitled Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer. Literally stumbled upon it in a magazine where I heard about it because it was being turned into a movie. All it said was that the book was about a boy who lost his father on September 11th. (Author's Note: Bruises is the title of this post because the boy gives himself bruises and I myself bruise easier than a peach. We have a connection.) I was intrigued by this description of the book, no ryhme or reason as to why though. So I picked it up from the library on Wednesday. It was one of the best books I have read in my life. It made me cry (hard to do, if you know me). It made me laugh. It made me wonder. It made me think really hard about life. Life in so many different forms.

I really cannot sing enough of its praises. I loved this book. Imagine my surprise then on Friday when I looked on Facebook and saw that my alma mater, Michigan State University, had just announced that they, in partnership with the City of East Lansing, had chosen this book, my book, as their book selection for the 10th anniversary of One Book, One Community. Here's the link for more info (Author's Note: Although this article was published on March 23, which was Wednesday when I had just started to read the book, I was not aware of their selection until Friday when I saw it on my Facebook.): http://news.msu.edu/story/9105/

I could not believe my eyes when I saw that this book, the book I had randomly heard about on Tuesday, began reading on Wednesday, and had fallen in love with on Thursday, was now going to be read by my school and former home for the past 4 years. It was a sign, I know somehow it just was. How could this book not be a sign? Too weird a coincidence not to be. The fact I had randomly heard about it, had read on a whim, and then saw the connection with my alma mater. It was a sign. How could this book not be a sign??

I really cannot pin down the theme of this book to share with you. Only that it was just an incredible piece of art. That is how I would describe it, as a piece of art. There are even pictures scattered throughout the book. But the characters and the story's words are the art. I know I was meant to read this book at this point in my life. I just know. Have you ever had an experience like this? I mean, you go about everything in your life and then one thing leads to another and you just know you were meant to read, feel, or experience a certain thing? It is an incredible thing. Intangible to describe.

One phrase has stuck with me from the novel. I cannot stop pondering its meaning. Its almost haunting me really. I'm going to work on doing this.
Starting now.
Hello world.

"You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness."

~ Extremley Loud & Incredibly Close 

Jonathan Safran Foer

pg. 180

Fortuity

At how many points in your life have you or someone you know come to find he or she in a circumstance where it can all be summed up in one phrase, "Really?" Now I say phrase as opposed to a word because of the question mark at the end of it. The question mark implies a certain emotion behind it. The emotions can range from awe, bewilderment, sarcasm, annoyance, disbelief, questioning and the list goes on and on.

Now I can remember quite a few times my last semester of college (actually like more or less a year ago this time of the year) where all I could say was "Really?" Well my friends, here I am 12 months later grasping for this phrase again.

Ok, so now that I have everyone thinking about their "Really?" moments, I'd like to pause before I explain myself and give a brief update. These days I find myself in the carpool shuffle, the library, Starbucks and networking for jobs. I've been nannying and doing make-up to earn a living and trying not to become too lazy. Although between the novel The Help and Chelsea Handler's books, I am enjoying my free time. Enough is enough with all the recess that February brought, I am working hard on finding a new position and am going to actually go to the gym more than once a week...

But ok, really? Here's the short version of my "Really?" story. Met a guy last May on one of my last nights at the Michigan State bars, we'll call him Mr. Tri.  Mr. Tri and I continued to talk all summer via text, Skype, phone, etc. Until one evening in October where our phone conversation ended perfectly fine. I text him the next day, get no response. A week later I text him one more time, still no response. At this point, I'm like ok well he's not into this anymore. Time carries on and I'm basically annoyed at why we stopped talking, but figure it's cause there is a new girl in Mr. Tri's life. Facebook tells me he's still single, yet you never know. Now its January 2011. I write happy birthday on his Facebook and use a nickname I had for him (let me remind you this is the first time I've reached out to contact him since October). After getting no response from Mr. Tri, I un-friend him from Facebook to free myself of the situation. Two points to me!

And here we are in March. No contact really at all with Mr. Tri in 5 months. Not going to lie, I've been in a guy dry spell. My supposed flirting skills are in a rut and it's also because because I haven't really been pursuing that aspect too. I've been trying to focus on the job and life thing (supposedly). But this weekend after a taxi ride where I tried to be nice and share a ride, with a 30 year old medical student and his drunk comrade grilling me on my dating life, all while I am desperately looking out the window waiting to get to the station, and then having them ask to take me out to I-HOP the next morning, I was checked out. Needless to say, I gave that taxi driver a very lucky Shamrock green bonus for driving fast.

I go to check my email for the first time in 2 days and there in my inbox is a message and request from LinkedIn. And who is it from? No other than Mr. Tri. Over 5 months with nada and then this. The message was brief and ended with "Sorry I'm an idiot..." Oh, really?

To close though, I'd like to end with a sense of fortuity. A fabulous word meaning: an accidental occurrence, an instance of great luck or great fortune. It's almost like another way of saying kismet (my namesake for this blog). I am going to focus on my fortuity in the rest of March. It's been real already 2011. I'm off to the library probably scouring the shelves on more books on finding your "self", career advice and the last Chelsea Handler novel. I may also be visiting Borders and getting the new book entitled Manning Up: How the Rise of Women Has Turned Men into Boys by Kay Hymowitz. See you in the self-help aisles...

Postcards of my life

So I'm sitting here listening to the cover of "Wagon Wheel" by Mumford and Sons on repeat and don't have a lot of words to go with my thoughts. Oh the irony. But with my little sister preparing to take the ACT and SAT it got me to thinking about my college essay. This was the essay that got me into every college I applied to. While I'm still attempting to locate the essay somewhere on our ancient computer in our basement, which looks like a giant dinosaur next to my cute little MacBook, I'm pretty sure it was entitled either "Snapshots of my Life" or "Postcards from my Life". So that is what I'm entitling today's post.
I really want to find that essay and see if I actually did all of the things I said I wanted to do in college! I am pretty sure that I did most of it, but I think it would be great fun to re-read it and see how much I have (hopefully) grown. So instead of writing about a lot of stuff I am finding quite boring, which includes anything really to do with what's going on in my life now, sad but true, I have decided to post some of my favorite pictures taken while studying abroad in Belize and Guatemala. Feel free to add captions to any of the pictures, and all of these pictures are owned by me :)

I love black and white pictures with people in them, it gives it such an authentic feeling to me! Here's to the almost end of February! It's going to be a good week, I can feel it!

I wish I was Adele

Legit, I really do wish I had the life of the singer Adele. All of my Wikipedia facts lead me to these conclusions. Adele was born exactly one month before me. She has won Grammys, given up drinking (already, I know!), moved out of her parent's place, has a British accent that's sweet and sings amazing songs, need I say more? Not to mention one of my current favorite songs is "Rolling in the Deep" and in it not only does Adele kill it, but I also really love her make up in it! Her whole look is fabulous. It also really makes me want to wear false eyelashes around all the time. True story, I wish I could wear them all the time! Check it out, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rYEDA3JcQqw&feature=related

Adele also described her music style as "heartbroken soul". Now I wish I was that cool or more of an artist where I could describe my style as "heartbroken soul". Not that I would ever do my make-up in a heartbroken way unless it was like for a photo shoot or anything like that! All this make-up talk may have people wondering where is this coming from? Well, here it is. I am a make-up junkie. There, I said it. I mean I always have been too, I've always loved blending my eye colors and am pretty sure that I was the only girl at my Turnabout in high school to do a dark red lip. In the past couple of years, I've expanded my make-up products and the circle I have done make up on. I have had no professional training but I love it regardless. I've done make-up for my older sister's friends for a couple events and this past summer did make up for bridesmaids and will be doing more bridesmaid make-up in March. I love making people feel beautiful on a very special day without taking the attention off the bride herself.

My current passion is my pink lip stain. I bought it on a whim to help me get in the "celebrating" mood for Valentine's Day. The first day I wore it (yesterday), I got a very nice compliment from a woman at the Clinique counter while buying some bronzer with my mom. Score, win from the make-up artist herself. Now I kind of wanna wear it all the time! It really makes me feel a little more powerful as I walk around in public, jobless and kinda lost in the mushiness of this day. Behold the power of pink, not that its my favorite color or anything...

But I truly cannot complain about my Valentine's Day this year. One of my AMAZING friends (thanks Ms. Kathryn Cross!) sent me a beautiful bouquet of pink roses on Friday and they look even better today in the sun and dare I say, warm temperatures? The sun was shining bright, my nails were painted in Katy Perry's OPI's collection in a delicious pink sparkly color entitled "Teenage Dream" (I and I got a compliment on it whilst buying my clothing today too!)  I got a fabulous massage, took a shower, put on my power pink lip stain, got a lovely pedicure, made sure my Mom AND Dad got each other gifts, bought some adorable spring clothes (which I cannot wait to wear!). So I really can't complain about my day. I tried to focus on all the great people in my life who already love me for me, pink lip stain and all.

 My lipstick isn't as pink as it was earlier today but you get the gist. Loving the lip color, nails and my wonderful roses! Loving the pink lifestyle in general :)